a slight shift.

It’s been three weeks since I moved, and I’ve noticed something.

All I do is apply for jobs, go to the gym, and read Harry Potter.

                Is that odd?

I’m not sure what is ‘normal’ for me anymore. That’s worrisome I guess. Since my return, I’ve been trying to mix the college Meg with the home Meg. It’s like the two worlds of George Costanzia, when they collide, one has to die. I’m trying to avoid death, and just have a mixture of my two selves.

College taught me so much about myself. I’m excited for round two, a whole new start, in the fall. But home is my favorite place to be. Let’s be honest, once you go away, everything changes.

It’s not the new paint downstairs, or countertops, or even the carpet samples. These are my blue walls. This is my home. But it’s slightly off.  

It’s not like a huge shift in the space time continuum; it’s like when you think about how often you blink. You tend to blink fifty times more than you did when you don’t think about it.

It’s a slight shift. It’s just… Odd.

It’s odd that I don’t feel quite as home in my ward anymore. I still love my ward, but secretly I’ve been thinking about trying the young adult ward. Shocking because I swore them off last summer when I was asked to attend it and refused.

It’s odd that I saw something that I’m not sure I was supposed to, but I saw it and now it’s gone. Am I supposed to pretend like I didn’t see it because they didn’t want me to see it after all?

It’s odd that I get giddy because today is tomorrow somewhere else, and tomorrow is P day.

                It’s odd because I know I should think about such things. Don’t fret, I’m reading He’s Just not That Into You along with my Harry Potter readings.   

 I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m still finding myself. Just because you come home, it doesn’t mean that everything is going to be sunshine and rainbows. Life is still in session, even if school isn’t.

Each day we all grow.

Each day I remember who I was, and in return I learn who I am.