black slacks and thursday rants.

Ever since I purchased my very first pair of black slacks from Target, I’ve hated the article of clothing.

I wore them to work every day for two summers. Yes, I had to purchase another pair because Robin hemmed them too short so my ankles showed. Two summers. Two years. That’s so crazy to me. I remember when I turned in my application; I remember all my answers to the interview questions. I even made my bed that day just in case they asked me if I made my bed that day.

Oh the things that happen in two years.

Back to the pants.

I purchased a new pair of black slacks yesterday. Real ones. Professional ones, because I got a new job in a professional place. I have training on Monday, but my first shift is on Saturday. I’m not sure how that works, but I’m going to have to figure out how to tie a tie before Saturday.

It’s symbolic. Of my growth and development over the years. I’m not the same doe-eyed girl I was two summers ago. I know who I am now, I’m not lost and depressed anymore.

I’m not even sure this is making sense, but it’s making me feel better.

I was grumpy yesterday because I was so nervous about my life. But guess what? It doesn’t matter that I’ve never had a ‘real’ boyfriend. It doesn’t matter that I haven’t gotten a letter yet. It doesn’t matter that I look dorky in my new black slacks. All that matters is that I am open to making new friends. That he’s far away and letters take awhile to come from his new land. And that I’m my own worst critic.

It’s all about attitude. That’s the change in me. I choose not to be that girl anymore. The girl who doesn’t speak her mind, let’s things build up inside of her until her emotions explode on people who don’t deserve it.

I choose to be myself, now and every day.

Who else am I supposed to be?

I choose to be happy.

Because why would I choose to be sad?

Happy Friday eve friends.

What do you choose to be?